For You

Once, after Pushkin
by Carol Rumens

I loved you once
D'you hear a small "I love you"
Each time we're forced to meet?
Don't groan, don't hide!
A damaged tree can live without a bud:
No one need break the branches and uncover
The green that should have danced, dying inside
I loved you, knowing I'd never be your lover
And now? I wish you summers of leaf-shine
And leaf-shade, and a face in dreams above you
As tender and as innocent as mine.

Jesus Is

"the visible image of the invisible God."
Colossians 1:15

groovy.

i can't wait for christmas. :)

winter

stark and barren
wintry trees
remind me of ashes
that were my dreams

i sit
and wish

that you were never there.

Happy Birthday Me!!

At the start of my 24th year..
World Changing Accomplishments: 0
Current boyfriends: 0
Cars: 0
Credit Card: 0
Condo: 0
Career: 0
Cash: not much
Happiness Rating: 10!!!

woohooo..

Roma, Firenze, Pisa, Venezia

So here are some pictures from l'italia, taken from my trusty 1.3 megapixel Nokia 6230i, which can take up to 200 pictures and 25sec video clips. :)


Me in front of the Coliseum, Roma.


Firenze. Pretty no? Quite lovely for honeymooning. And the shopping? They'll make you offers you can't refuse.


Pisa Tower. :)


Venezia. Pretty. And expensive.

I think my favourite was Florence. :) Hopefully next time around, i'll get to explore the countryside instead of the main touristy cities. Gotta brush up on italian though. Yet another thing to do before i reach 30.

Ciao!

141 Drury Lane

it's good to be back. really. i think i've fulfilled my travelling quota for the year.. no wait, there's spain in 10 days time.
ok, but, at the very least. i'm done walking for the rest of the week. my feet are just about worn off.
:P

ps: pictures soon!! :)
ps2: london's still pretty rockin. at least people here speak english. :)

florence

is so pretty and i just spent a LOT of money on shopping.
it's so romantic here.. and peaceful.. just beautiful. stuff of dreams. lol.

Prego!

Hi from Rome. it's quite awe-inspiring. must be hard for italians to live under the shadow of such grandeur:)

can't believe i'm here. hahaha.

god is so awesome.

next stops: florence, pisa, venice.

mwah.

new song

So I’ll stand
With arms high and heart abandoned
In awe of the One who gave it all
I’ll Stand
My soul Lord to You surrendered
All I am is Yours

***

team houston rocks.

V's bday

It was, a great party. :)

..

It feels like i've been here forever when actually, i've only been here less than 3 months and out of that, only two months in school. But in everything, I still believe God is working.. somehow.. even if I've been rather naughty and neglectful of the "fellowship of the body of believers". But then I just trust that he works not based on who i am or what i do, but simply because He is what He is, and I just gotta trust the heart of the Father even if i don't understand the workings of His hand at times.

I finally dropped the half-unit course that I've felt have been really unhelpful during this term after weeks of agonizing over the decision. Carried the "drop-form" in my bag for days before finally chucking it into the box at Students' Services. Yesterday I checked my online status and the good news is that they allowed me to drop it even in the 8th week of term. The bad news is that I have to take two half-unit courses next term, which means extra work. The other good news is that the courses are about stuff that I care about currently (and hopefully will care about next term as well), taught by decent professors and hence those two factors will be motivation enough.

Newly discovered resources: The School of Oriental and African Studies (SOAS) library and the University of London Library which, together with the LSE library carry just about all the books in the world. I found so many books (outside my required reading list) that I've been looking for ages, like, for example, the personal letters and diaries of David Livingstone, the Father Brown collection by Chesterton, Chinese Classics translated into English by James Legge, and a whole lot of other works from world history to literature and beyond beyond beyonddddddd that i can't wait to sink my teeth into. And that's motivating me to get my required reading list out of the way so I can start on my extra-curricular list. Wooohooo... :) i love london.

Ok so. I was just thinking about how things turn out. Most of the time, we start out on a new road purposefully with a "to-do" list which sometimes can turn out to be a very anal "must-do list". And even if all the signs and hints (from above and below) are pointing us in a different direction, sometimes we can be so adamant and set in our ways. While being focused on the goal is a great thing, having a bit of "flexibility" (without of course, being wishy-washy and fickle) to make changes when necessary is something which i have to continually keep in mind. lol. The tricky part is, of course, knowing when to stick with the plan, and when to change. That's where prayer and God comes in I guess.

At any rate, I'd like to think that there's nothing too bad that cannot be undone. And no experience is ever a waste, even if it may seem like "big mistakes" at that moment. The end of a thing is always the beginning of something new. :)

moving right along.

ps: if all goes according to plan, i'll be taking up *ehhem* women rugby soon. lol.

Waiting for answers to life's current most important questions

Will it snow today?

Will it snow this week?

Will it snow at all in London?

Can I play in the snow if it snows?

Will it snow at Warwick this Saturday?

Will we play in the snow if it snows at Warwick this Saturday?

How cold will it be if it snows?

k and my lack

k says: (17:20:50)
let me be your inspiration

k says: (17:20:50)
hahaha

g. says: (17:20:54)
yeah

g. says: (17:21:11)
inspire me to do what?

g. says: (17:21:16)
there're different kinds of inspiration

k says: (17:21:22)
anything you want

k says: (17:21:29)
any kind of inspiration

g. says: (17:21:30)
that's a toughie

k says: (17:21:47)
i can even inspire you to talk in points and citations

g. says: (17:22:32)
i don't wanna talk with points and citations

g. says: (17:22:37)
i wanna talk with passion and feeling

g. says: (17:22:52)
anybody who reads can talk in points and citations

g. says: (17:23:04)
but you need to be inspired to talk with passion

g. says: (17:23:15)
unless you're inspired to talk in points and citations
***

i'm losing it. sigh.

from papa marx

Segui il tuo corso; e lascia dir le genti.
- Follow your own bent, and let people say what they will.

some pictures from our hall's halloween party

Top: Olympio and the Girls
Bottom: My Neighbours Who Are Quite Mental

White China

So after standing in line for 1.5 hours with our feet and fingers steadily turning into ice in the early London winter, me, V and E decided to call it quits and head home.

K, on the other hand, decided to pursue the china white dream because "it's so close.. so close to the door.." and insisting that "I'm not doing something for nothing". So we left him, and trudged back to Drury Lane. V and E were flirting with each other so i guess they didn't care whether or not they were in china white or out of china white, and they later finished a bottle of wine downstairs while watching West Wing.

Me, i just wanted to go home and study for my french test and do my readings or sit in solitude and write in my journal because i'm quite tired of going out and hanging around people, and my insides are all out of equilibrium and need some realigning but i don't know where or how to start putting my house in order.

And damnit, it's so cold, too. I switched on the stove and the table lamp to generate more heat but it doesn't seem to be working and i think my heater's just being funky cos it's definitely warmer in the other rooms. Mine's officially the coldest and i can't seem to figure out why.

And now that i've read about five pages and amartya sen's mini biography online, i'm quite ready to sleep. I still haven't read for french. Maybe i'll do it tomorrow morning. Yet something tells me that I'll probably only do it an hour before class cos i don't seem to care anymore. It's terrible.

But here's something from Sen which i really like, from his book on famine: "Starvation is the characteristic of some people not having enough food to eat. It is not the characteristic of there being not enough food to eat."

China White

I have been "coerced" into going to this club, called China White.

I have a French test tomorrow and I haven't studied for it.

I have a seminar tomorrow and I haven't finish reading the stuff necessary to make intellectual comments in class.

I have to go.

S is not going.

Back to Earth

To Do:

1. Join connect group in church
2. Keep track of classes and reading lists
3. Pay attention in class and read listed material
4. Buy a highlighter
5. Make notes
6. Spend time at the library
7. Focus focus focus

ARGGHHHhHhHHH!!

yawn..

i should change my sleeping habits. 10am is turning out to be too early. doesn't help too that it's so cold. really. cold.
ARGH.

OVERKILL

that's what it is.