Wednesday, December 30, 2009

last posting of the year

2009 - what a great year you have been
exams, results, family people, more people, much much more people, a lot
hi from mumbai - india's fantastic apart from the fact
that i miss EVERYONE what was I thinking?
oh well seize the day
2010 - the best is yet to come!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

"Because your love.."

" better than my life. i lift up my hands, in sacrifice.."

Delirious' "God, You're my God" playing in my head since yesterday.

We're going to the house of God, EVERYBODY!

Monday, November 30, 2009

Farewell Delirious

Went for Delirious' last concert (EVER.. for now!) last night. Got tickets by a miracle (They were sold out) and got tickets for friends too (an even bigger miracle) and man, what a night! The cutting edge band started off with the really old tunes.. followed by Delirious riffs after a 15-minute break. Sang all the favourites - obssession, king or cripple, im not ashamed, find me in the river, majesty.. man.. so blown away..

as a result, had delirious juke box playing in head since last night and this whole morning..woke up singing the happy song: My heart is BURSTING LORD! To tell of ALL YOU'VE DONE!! OF how you've changed my life and WASHED AWAY THE PAST!! I WANNA SHOUT IT OUT! FROM EVERY ROOFTOP SING!! FOr now I know my God is for me not against me!!

Saturday, September 12, 2009


Lamb says somewhere that if, of three friends (A,B and C), A should die, then B not only loses A but "A"'s part in C, while C loses not only A but 'A's part in B'. In each of my friends there is something that only some other friend can fully bring out. By myself I am not large enough to call the whole man into activity; i want other lights than my own to show all his facets. Now that Charles is dead, I shall never again see Ronald's reaction to a specifically Charles joke. Far from having more of Ronald, having him 'to myself' now that Charles is away, I have less of Ronald. Hence true Friendship is the least jealous of loves. Two friends delight to be joined by a third, and three by a fourth, if only the newcomer is qualified to become a real friend. They can then say, as the blessed souls say in Dante, 'Here comes one who will augment our loves.' For in this love 'to divide is not to take away'...we possess each friend not less but more as the number of those with whom we share him increases. In this, Friendship exhibits a glorious 'nearness by resemblance' to Heaven itself where the very multitude of the blessed [which no man can number] increases the fruition which each has of God. For every soul, seeing Him in her own way, doubtless communicates that unique vision to all the rest. That, says an old author, is why the Seraphim in Isaiah's vision are crying 'Holy, holy, holy' to one another [ Isa 6:3 ]. The more we thus share the Heavenly Bread, the more we shall all have."

-C.S Lewis.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

taking stock

it's been 2 years since I left the phd programme and almost 4 years since i left manila. on both occassions i had no idea what was in front of me, only that i had to leave, that my time in that season had come to an end. here, today, i am testifying that god has been so faithful during those times. and i am here, right now, lying on my bed, in west hill, having no words to adequately express the depth of gratitude and thanksgiving i feel towards god for all the great things he has done in my life.


i was chatting online with a dear friend today and she reminded me of an old blog that me, her and another friend used to collectively write back in the summer of 2005. i had almost forgotten about the blog. had a browse through it and man, it brought back some memories it did.

i love this life of mine i do. it has turned out to be way better than all i could have asked for or imagine. the reality of god and all that he is and has done for me is stronger than ever before and i am humbled by all of it.

"every single detail of my life is lined up with the will of heaven" - a line written back in 2005..hah.. it seems more real than ever it does.

"Hear, O Israel: the Lord is our God, the Lord is One."

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Song of the season

Tuesday, June 30, 2009


A chronicle has it that the celebrated Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Lyady was locked up in a St. Petersburg prison after being denounced by a foe of the Hasidic movement as an agitator against the Czar.

One day the warden came to see him in his solitary cell, and this is what he said:

"I am told you are a rabbi, a Master. So explain to me a passage I fail to understand in the Bible. It says in the Book of Genesis that, after having bitten into the forbidden fruit, Adam fled, so that the Lord had to ask him: 'Ayekha, where are you?' Is it possible, even conceivable, that the Creator of the world did not know where Adam was hiding?"

Whereupon the rabbi smiled and answered: "The Lord, blessed-be-His-name, knew; it was Adam who didn't know."

And Rabbi Shneur Zalman went on: "Do you believe the Bible to be a sacred book?"


"And that it speaks to all mankind, of all times, therefore also to ours?"

"Yes, I believe that."

"In that case, I shall explain to you the real meaning of the question God asked of Adam. Ayekha signifies: Where do you stand in this world? What is your place in history? What have you done with your life, Adam? These are fundamental questions that every human being must confront sooner or later.

"For every one of us, the book of life goes back to Adam. It is he who embodies the mystery of the beginning. But it is to each of us that God speaks when He says Ayekha."

To write, to write about oneself, one's past, one's burden of memory, is somewhat like that: to keep alive this first question in the Bible.

- Elie Wiesel, "And the sea is never full", pg 3, 4

Monday, June 22, 2009


A mystical experience is not a satisfying one. It is burning. It is a ride on the tail of a comet, freezing, searing - for cold can burn even more than fire. It is not psychologically satisfying to have nightside and sunside meet in a blaze of ice and fire, to understand God as utterly distant and unknowable and yet so close that the comfort of the shadow of his wings can be intimately felt. In this rare, almost unbreathable atmosphere, sunside and nighside are resolved in paradox, and the incomprehensible is yet in some measure comprehended in contradiction.

- Madeleine L'engle "The Irrational Season" p. 147

Monday, June 15, 2009

latest song

"My whole life is yours
I give it all
Surrendered to your name
And forever I will pray
Have your way
Have your way.."


Saturday, June 06, 2009

Halfway there

49.8% remaining!!

time flies.

how good is god.


Friday, May 22, 2009

may sky

i had a dream.. i.. stood beneath an orange sky =)

im knackered.

exams in 2.5 weeks. bit of nervous.

but all will be well.

thank god for good friends and yummy food.

should be enough for now, i reckon.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

nothing compares

to the greatness of knowing You God!!

Saturday, February 07, 2009


"here is what I wanted to tell you today... Get a life. Get a real life, not just the manic pursuit of the next degree, the next promotion, the bigger payday, the nicer car, the better house. (Do you think you would care about those things if you had a heart attack one afternoon, or if you found a lump in your breast?) Get a deep life, not just the relentless comfort of consumer goods and mass entertainments. Get a life filled with relationships, not just a collection of things and accomplishments. Or perhaps I should not say get a life, when what I really suggesting is for you to be careful to build well the one you and you alone already possess"

Bart Campolo

Monday, February 02, 2009

Snowed In

First time ever that I've been snowed in. Love the absolute still and silence as cars are not running as fast and there are no planes flying over.

It's so pretty outside too.. snow up to about 10cm now which may not seem much for some but plenty for london zone 2!

Loved the opportunity yesterday to talk about Jesus (again!) to this chick who was new to church. Also in awe of the most heart-warming, incredible, class-of-their-own legendary friends in the form of J and T who are surely undeserved gifts.

Was supposed to go to Gloucester today for an away job for five days. Instead have been told by senior and manager to not travel until it's "safe". I was asked by K to define "safe". I suppose if trains from paddington are cancelled and the tube is not running, that's unsafe enough for me!

The day feels like a cosmic gift in the form of time and wonderment. Time to not work, time to enjoy and breathe in every second of the moment, time to lie by the window and be mesmerized by the snowflakes, the wonder of seeing london all covered in fresh snow, the wonder!! Wonder!! :) (and may i add: time that could be spent cleaning and tidying my room).

i'm loving it. =)